Hi! Thanks for dropping by for this week’s installment of A Wedding Planner’s Wedding! This week, we’re talking about your wedding party. We’ll talk about why I chose who I did, and who and why my fiance chose who he did. I’m also going to give you 6 tips on choosing your own wedding party and creative ways to ask them!

Your wedding party is important. They’re the squad you have working for you leading up to and on the big day. They’ll be the ones there to talk you down when you get cold feet! When you almost spill a mimosa on your dress, they will be there with a wet towelette to wipe it off! When your groom loses his boutonniere, his best man will be the one to find it! Hopefully, none of these things happen, but in a word, they are there to help you when your coordinator can’t step in.

My whole life, I knew I would ask my best childhood friend to be there for me on my big day. You try and you try and you plan and you plan, but the wedding you’ve been planning since you were a little girl will never be the exact same. When I was planning my wedding as a little girl, I never expected to have TWO really great people in my life! Needless to say, I couldn’t choose. I wanted Abby (best friend from childhood and states) AND Sage (best friend from weddings and island) to be there for me on my wedding day. It was obvious that I had to have them both! That’s right, I have two Matron’s of Honor–and I couldn’t be more honored! My St. Thomas wedding is ready for anything!

Tim and I will have only a few people in all since we’re only inviting a select few for our special day. He chose his drummer and best friend on island to be his best man.

There are really no rules or regulations for choosing your wedding party. If so, I’m breaking the rules by having two Matrons of Honor. Below, there are the 6 tips to choosing your own wedding party!

1. First, with your husband/wife-to-be, sit down and discuss your expectations for how many you expect to each have. Make a list together, then go from there.
2. Be sure you want them to be in your wedding party. Once you ask, you shouldn’t take it back.
3. Keep realistic expectations. On average, it costs $200 or more to be in a wedding party. If you’re knowingly asking someone to be in your wedding party that cannot pay that, you should be ready to foot the bill yourself.
4. If someone asked you to be in their wedding, you do not have to reciprocate. And don’t let anyone think that.
5. Make sure to choose someone who is supportive of your marriage!
6. You should choose someone you consider to be a friend you will always have.

Finally, here are some creative ways to ask!

A. You could just ask. It’s actually what I ended up having to do with Sage, since she was trying to work on my wedding day. That’s right, I asked via text message. Prior to that I purchased an RTic cup personalized by Iconic Imprint. It just hadn’t arrived on island yet. She was thrilled when she finally got it!

B. You could fill a big box with fun gifts and send it. I did this with Abby since she doesn’t live on island. It was filled with some cutesy stuff for her from Icing.

These are really the only ways to ask that appealed to me. I love these ladies and I’m thrilled to have them as part of my wedding.

How did you ask your wedding party?